My Flying Sword is Not a Drone!

I am Qiao Zhendong, the supreme Grandmaster of Alchemy and Poisons. So why am I locked in a room with padded walls wearing a back-fastening robe? It started with a bizarre mail delivery: a long, rectangular box containing my spiritual weapon, the Venom-Spitter. Naturally, my fiercely strict psychiatrist, Dr. Croft, confiscated it, claiming it was an unregistered, weaponized drone. The audacity of these mortals! While the staff scribbles down my profound cultivation truths as 'severe delusions of grandeur', I've noticed the violent tremors shaking the foundations of the Veridia Bay Asylum. A primordial earth dragon is trapped beneath the tectonic plates, and it's waking up. I can suppress it using ward-sealing acupuncture and courtyard-weed pills, but my favorite nurse keeps 'accidentally' sweeping away my arrays. With a silent patient who tragically possesses the reincarnated soul of my lost immortal love watching my every move, and a hospital director begging to learn my 'miracle holistic medicine' after I cured his gout, can I stop the apocalypse before visiting hours end?