Gravity became a physical enemy, pressing down on Elias’s tiny chest until his lungs screamed for air. Every breath felt like inhaling wet cement, a cruel reminder that their S-Tier magical reserves did absolutely nothing to strengthen their fragile, infant bones. Heavy, iron-shod boots clicked against the damp cobblestones, echoing with a terrifying weight that seemed to vibrate through the stone floor of the cathedral courtyard. Each step was deliberate, a slow countdown to their capture, sending ripples through the shallow puddles of rainwater around them.
Elias squinted through his tiny, chubby eyelids, his infant heart hammering against his ribs like a trapped bird. The towering figure of the Sentinel loomed over them, clad in silver plate armor that reflected the dim, overcast sky of the Holy Capital.
Beside him, Jasper let out a wet, baby-sized grunt, his massive infant fists clenching around a heavy pouch of stolen gold coins. The coins clinked softly, a metallic sound that felt incredibly loud in the tense silence of the alleyway.
Memories of their previous life flashed behind Elias’s eyes, vivid, unwelcome, and dripping with corporate trauma. This massive guard, with his rigid posture and unyielding authority, felt exactly like their old division head back in Tokyo. That particular brand of suffocating, soul-crushing pressure was unmistakable. It was the exact feeling of standing in front of a desk at 8:55 PM on a Friday night, watching a manager drop a three-hundred-page audit report onto your keyboard.
Only this time, the boss didn't carry a red pen; he carried a seven-foot halberd that gleamed with cold, unsympathetic steel. The edge of the blade hummed with a faint, divine enchantment, designed to cleave through rogue mages and demons alike.
"Halt," a voice boomed from beneath the steel visor, vibrating the very stones beneath their tiny bodies. "What manner of sorcery is this? Answer me, creatures."
Looking up at the giant, Elias felt a surge of pure, unadulterated annoyance wash over his mind. They had survived thirty-five years of corporate slavery, died a sudden, unfair death on a rain-slicked highway, and finally reincarnated into a fantasy world. Yet here they were, barely a few weeks old, already facing another power-tripping middle-manager trying to dictate their schedule. It was an absolute insult to their hard-earned freedom, and Elias refused to spend this lifetime filling out metaphorical timesheets.
Jasper nudged Elias with a fat, chubby elbow, his dark eyes communicating a clear, pragmatic message with a single look. "Do we kill him?" Jasper’s expression seemed to ask, his tiny jaw tightening as a wisp of black smoke leaked from his nostrils.
Shaking his head slightly, Elias made a micro-movement that wouldn't catch the towering guard's attention. Killing a high-ranking Sentinel of the Church within the capital walls would bring an entire army of paladins down on their heads before they could even crawl properly.
They needed an escape, not an all-out war that would drain their energy and ruin their chances of an early retirement. More importantly, they needed to protect their ultimate goal of absolute, uncompromising laziness. No overtime, no forced labor, and definitely no heroic destinies dictated by some ancient prophecy. They had agreed to be lazy, beer-drinking, girl-chasing freeloaders, and they were going to stick to the plan.
A heavy hand reached down, the metal gauntlet clicking as the fingers flexed, preparing to scoop them up like stray puppies. Runes on the Sentinel’s armor began to glow with a harsh, white light, seeking to bind their magical signatures before they could resist.
Elias felt his S-Tier Light Magic thrumming deep within his tiny soul, eager, incredibly dense, and hot as a miniature sun. It felt like holding a coiled, glowing spring inside his chest, begging to be released into the world. Bracing his soft baby bones, Elias focused every ounce of his mental discipline, treating the magical flow like a complex budgeting spreadsheet. If these religious zealots wanted a divine miracle, he would give them one they couldn't possibly ignore.
Concentrating his energy, he channeled the light upward, bypassing his tiny hands and focusing entirely on his forehead. Suddenly, a brilliant, blinding ring of pure golden light erupted above his head, casting a warm glow over the wet stone.
It wasn't just a simple spark; it was a roaring, magnificent halo that cast long, dramatic shadows across the entire courtyard. The light was so intense that it painted the grey stone walls in shades of brilliant gold, mimicking the descent of a high angel.
Sentinel guards across the plaza gasped, stumbling backward as the blinding glare forced them to shield their steel visors. The sheer density of the light magic trickled down, completely disorienting their senses.
"The... the prophecy?" the lead guard stammered, dropping to one knee in sheer awe and confusion, his halberd clattering against the ground. "A child of the golden dawn... here?"
Taking advantage of the distraction, Elias leaned toward Jasper’s ear, his tiny lips brushing against his bro's shoulder.
"Prep a low-altitude blast," Elias whispered, his voice a tiny, high-pitched squeak that barely carried over the crackle of magic.
"Aim down. Make it count."
Jasper didn't hesitate for a single second, his pragmatic mind instantly grasping the mechanics of the requested launch. His eyes turned pitch-black, absorbing the ambient light around them as he gathered his S-Tier Dark Magic into his tiny legs.
Unlike Elias’s flashy show, Jasper’s magic was heavy, silent, and incredibly dense, smelling of ozone and cold iron. It pooled beneath them like a puddle of liquid midnight, sinking into the cracks of the cobblestones and weakening the physical structure of the earth.
Elias maintained the glowing halo, making it pulse with a faux-divine rhythm to keep the guard’s eyes glued upward. He even threw in a few sparkling golden particles for dramatic effect, knowing how much these church types loved visual flair.
"Praise the heavens," the Sentinel whispered, completely mesmerized by the brilliant display, his hands clasped in prayer.
"Now!" Elias squeaked, shutting his eyes tight and bracing for the impact.
Jasper detonated the dark magic.
A localized, controlled implosion of dark energy shattered the ground beneath their tiny, diaper-clad bodies. Instead of blowing them to pieces, the sheer kinetic force of the dark blast acted like a massive, pressurized spring.
Upward they flew, launched like twin cannonballs into the overcast sky. Screaming in high-pitched baby voices, they soared over the towering, fifty-foot stone walls of the monastery.
Wind rushed past Elias’s face, whipping his dirty-blonde hair into a wild mess and stealing the breath from his mouth. Below them, the massive cathedral courtyard shrank into a tiny square, the confused Sentinel looking like a silver toy.
For a terrifying second, Elias wondered if Jasper had miscalculated the trajectory in his infant brain. If they hit the hard cobblestones of the outer city, S-Tier magic wouldn't save their fragile infant skulls from painting the streets red.
Luckily, a wooden cart piled high with fresh, golden hay was rattling down the narrow street just outside the walls. Gravity asserted itself with brutal speed, pulling them down toward the moving target.
Falling through the air, Elias clutched the stolen gold pouch to his chest with one arm, while Jasper grabbed his collar with a vice-like grip.
They hit the hay with a soft, explosive thump that sent dried grass flying in every direction. Dust and dry straw exploded around them, filling the air with a sweet, earthy scent that tickled Elias's nose.
Buried deep in the pile, Elias coughed, waving his tiny hands to clear the dust from his eyes. He poked his head out of the straw, blinking against the bright sunlight of the outer district.
Beside him, Jasper popped up, a single piece of straw stuck to his forehead, looking thoroughly unbothered by the high-speed flight.
Shaking the straw from his dirty-blonde hair, Elias let out a ragged breath, feeling the tension drain from his tiny muscles. They had actually made it.
They were out of the immediate clutches of the church, and they had a bag of gold to jumpstart their new life. Looking back at the towering walls of the monastery, Elias felt a cold resolve harden in his chest.
"Never again," Elias muttered, his voice dripping with venom as he looked at his tiny, soft hands.
We aren't letting anyone hold a leash over us ever again.
Jasper nodded solemnly, extending a chubby, dirt-caked hand toward his bro, his dark eyes reflecting the same fierce independence.
They bumped fists, a silent, mutual pact of lazy defiance sealed in the back of a moving hay cart. Ultimate relaxation was their true north now.
Living like kings was their only destiny, free from the shackles of endless labor and demanding superiors.
Anyone who tried to get in the way of their comfortable retirement would be systematically dismantled.
---
Rattling over the bumpy cobblestones of the merchant district, the cart carried them further away from the holy grounds. Elias leaned back against the warm hay, letting his S-Tier Light Magic settle back into his core.
Something felt off.
Glancing over at Jasper, Elias froze. A faint, purple glow was pulsing on Jasper's collarbone, revealing a jagged, runic brand.
It looked like a broken chain, burning silently against his baby skin with a dangerous, dark energy.
Elias looked down at his own chest, pulling back the collar of his tiny, dirt-stained tunic.
Right there, over his heart, was an identical brand, glowing with an opposing, golden light that hummed with a strange frequency.
Two opposing marks hummed in perfect unison, vibrating against their skin like a pair of matching tuning forks.
With every pulse, Elias felt a distinct, physical tug, as if his S-Tier Light energy was being steadily drained into the void.